Not a day passes without Bertie reading some breathless reports on how artificial intelligence (AI) is going to change the world. To be honest, AI has not made deep inroads into Bertie’s life except for how he searches for things online. But Bertie knows he is a borderline Luddite, so he tends to believe it when smart people tell him that AI is a game-changer.
To educate himself more on the AI revolution, Bertie attended a talk by a world-renowned expert whose forte is tracing the wide evolutionary arc of almost everything, including technology. The gentleman is quite persuasive and had the audience nodding in agreement when he said, “AI is different from other technologies. It is not a tool; it is an agent.” By that he meant that AI was not just another weapon wielded by humans but that it was representing or replacing the human itself. “What places to bomb in Gaza was decided by AI and executed by humans. That is a role-reversal,” the expert concluded. A scared Bertie could not bring himself to clap along with the fawning audience.
As is his wont, Bertie repeated these lines to the CEO of a financial services firm. He thought for a moment and said, “You know what Bertie–AI cannot be sent to jail and it cannot be hanged.” This needed explanation and Bertie’s blank stare conveyed that. “Any decision that requires affixing the end responsibility will always need a human sign-off. Things like: Why did you prescribe this drug to this patient? How did the court arrive at this decision? On what basis was the loan sanctioned? AI can help but a human will have to decide.” Now that made sense too. The CEO continued, “Till then AI will be a tool but a very powerful one at that.”
Read more: The age of AI will yield a new customer who marketers must win over
Bertie was reminded of the famous lines by F. Scott Fitzgerald, “The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.” On the way back from meeting the CEO, Bertie enjoyed some AI-fed reels on Instagram, which means he was functioning perfectly; which then means he has a first-rate intelligence. Bertie preened at the thought.
The spending habits of the young
Bertie likes the company of young people. At family gatherings, he carefully avoids the whiskey-gulping oldies who have unyielding opinions about everything from what Trump will do and what Rohit should do. These assertions are generally based on unverified WhatsApp forwards circulated on their retiree group. He steers himself towards the nieces and nephews primarily because they play good music but also because they are the consumers of tomorrow and Bertie wants to know their ways of life.
For a couple of months, Bertie’s niece Kash was staying at his house and booking a cab ride to her college was an everyday family activity. Four people were made to open two ride-hailing apps each to see who gets the cheapest fare and the lucky winner would then have the good fortune of booking a ride for the princess. The savings from this whole rigmarole never exceeded a hundred rupees. Kash has also perfected the algorithm for going out. This involves using the right app to book a table, selecting the right restaurant that has cheap drinks and knowing the right credit card to pay with. Not following her instructions is an invitation to be lectured about not appreciating the value of money. The irony of generational role-reversal is not lost on Bertie. Again, savings have rarely exceeded a few hundred rupees.
Bertie was about to conclude that fast fashion and value retailing were the things to be bullish about when Kash danced into the living room one day to announce that she had scored two Coldplay tickets for over thirty thousand rupees. Not one to miss an opportunity, Bertie started to lob the sermons about money’s worth back to her when she rolled her eyes and said, “Save the small. Spend on the big, mausaji!” Bertie is now also looking for listed plays that organize concerts.
Bertie is a Mumbai-based fund manager whose compliance department wishes him to cough twice before speaking and then decide not to say it after all.
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